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    Kids In The Wedding Party

Kids In The Wedding Party

Should They Be in Yours?
By Gretchen Maurer

Aren't they cute?! Wedding pictures aren't complete without a flower girl and a ring bearer! Or maybe you don't want kids and your getting a little flack?

Kids will be kids! This phrase wasn't coined by accident. If you want kids in the wedding remember you are not getting married on Fantasy Island! Having attended to the beauty needs of hundreds of brides I have seen and heard my share of kids in the wedding party stories. Following are some tips and suggestions to help you get a better perspective on having children in attendance.

Some brides want it all; kids, dogs, butterflies, doves, you name it. So if your heart is set on having your little niece and your cousin's son walk down the aisle then I say go for it! But do it with planning! Some brides think they want the kids in the wedding, but the bride may find she is better off having cardboard cutouts as stand- IN's then to have to deal with the real thing. On the other hand some of you are leaning to the side of a "no kids" wedding. For those of you sitting on the fence, let me help you choose a side.

When to have kids in the wedding party:

  1. You love children! You love their spontaneity and if they do something silly you think it will just add more charm and laughs to your day. (You'll make a great Mom too!)
  2. You are getting married early in the day. Kids are better when it is not too late in the day. This way Mom and Dad will not have to leave early to get their cranky angels off to bed. Or plan on hiring someone to whisk the kids away for the night.
  3. The children are local and can sleep in their own bed the night before. I had a bride who was having a male friend's daughter in the wedding. However, the child's parents were divorced so the mother was not in attendance to the wedding. The little girl couldn't hang out with Daddy and the grooms' men, so the bride had her sleep at her house the night before. The bride arrived late and stress to the salon the next morning because SHE had to give the child a morning bath! Not Good!
  4. They are your own children. By all means they should be a part of this special event. By being included and involved they will feel more secure about their significance and place in your new life.
  5. You don't care how her hair looks. Requesting a specific hairstyle for the flower girl can get tricky. Not every child's hair will hold a curl, nor will they sit long enough to get it done.

    I had three little sisters that were all in the wedding. Once the mother got everyone through the door and into the brides non-child proof small apartment everyone was stressed! The bride wanted them all to have French braids and the youngest child was three years old. She kept pushing my hand out of the way and as I would braid a section of hair she would rip it out. Oh well!
  6. You know they are "good" children. Some kids are born to be in weddings. Lois Pearce, President of Beautiful Occasions in Hamden, Connecticut adds, " One of the key things to think about when considering these children is their maturity level. Does the child behave well (within reason) around adults? Are they able to understand directions?

Just because they are cute is not the criteria for them to upstage the bride on her wedding day." Whether they love the attention or they are easy going and compliant you and their parents need to feel confident they will do their job well. Hey, considered them for hire. ( Just kidding )

By Gretchen Maurer, Bridal hair specialist and author of "The Business of Bridal Beauty", as well as creator of

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